61 minutes of Disco

At least that's what my DVR tells me we're in for tonight. In all actuality, the show will probably run over. Unless Bruce Gowers got fired. Doubt it, though.

The Washington Post had an article that bashes the new format in which each singer only got critiques from two of the judges instead of the entire panel of four. Thankfully, that is now gone, only what are they going to do in order to come in under time? Chronically going over time is something that is not only infuriating the Fringe fans, but local affiliates, which are seeing their local news broadcasts (and accompanying ad revenues) shrink.

Of course, the problem isn't the fourth judge. While Kara seems superflous, adding a new voice is probably a good idea since the other three have become so predictable. If Idol doesn't want to cut out any of the other filler, they have to get rid of a judge, and in my opinion is should not be Kara. The logical choice is Randy, who used to be the most technical and knowledgeable of the judges, but now that he's gone ghetto and can't speak English anymore, he's become expendable.

Paula is too valuable, both as the lone cheerleader for the bad singers and because she is wildly unpredictable in terms of what she says and does. Simon is simply unexpendable. He is often the singular voice of reason on the panel. My only problem with him is that he lets Seacrest goad him too much.

That brings me to another of my pet peeves about the show: If this is a "singing competition" there should be more singing. Less of Seacrest's giant ego that ditched Dunkleman. Less blather out of the host. Think back to Dick Clark . . . what made him great? The show wasn't about him. It was about his guests. A good host is invisible.

Contrary to what Seacrest believes, no one is tuning in to watch him. His job is to keep things moving, not stop it with some lame joke or a cheap shot at Simon.

If Ken Warwick & company want to keep the four judge panel, that's fine. But something has to go. Whether it's filler, advertisements (which we know won't happen) or incessant yapping by the host, something needs to be done to get the show back on track. I think ratings are either up or holding steady because people are staying home and watching TV due to the recession, not because the show is necessarily any better this season. If the economy picks back up, I think ratings will drop if Nigel is not brought back to right the ship.

In other news, there are rumours that Simon may leave Idol. At first I thought this was preposterous; after all, the show makes him gazillions of dollars, but after some thought, it would not surprise me. Let's face it: American Idol needs Simon more than Simon needs American Idol.

He already has more money than god. He's on Pop Idol, Britain's Got Talent and is associated with other projects and brands. Why would he want the headache of American Idol anymore? In some ways, I feel he thinks the show has run its course. The seasons have started running together, he's recycling the same bland insults and the show has not generated a bona fide superstar since Carrie Underwood in Season 4. So why fly back and forth from London to LA three or four times a week?

What will Idol do if Cowell quits? I'll bet the franchise folds within two seasons.

I don't think he'll quit after next season, but don't be surprised if he's gone the year after.

One of my eight readers sent me an email and asked me address Susan Boyle's appearance on Britain's Got Talent and her subsequent viral infiltration of the interweb. In case you've been living under a rock, you can view her on YouTube (I'd post the video here, but embedding has been disabled).

I like Susan. What I find refreshing about her is that she is basically unfiltered. Idol used to be that way. But now, the people who go on know they're playing a game and there's no spontaneity. Each is a shill for votes, and I think the almost naive way some of the singers in the first three seasons acted is now a thing of the past.

Maybe Diana Degarmo is to blame. As much as I like her, her beauty queen persona put some people off and I think paved the way for those who came later (FRC, Chris Sligh, Adam) who know everything they do is going to be dissected and discussed ad nasueum on the internets, message boards and anywhere The Google will reach.

Idol used to be a singing competition. In some ways, America's/Britain's Got Talent still are. Though in the future both of those shows will start seeing performers who are much more self-aware than they are now.

What I also like about Susan is the quality of her singing. If the other shows truly were "singing competitions" there would be lots more Susan Boyles on TV and fewer Haley Scarnatos. I wonder, though, what it is about Susan that intrigues us.

Is it that we have forgotten that we are supposed to live in a meritocracy, where people are judged and valued for their talents and accomplishments, and not the innate circumstances of their births? If she were in another body (and twenty years younger), she would be wiping the floor with this year's crop of Idol finalists. Yet she's not and people are amazed.

Do we feel better because we stand and applaud the one unattractive woman who can sing while ignoring all the others we pass by on a daily basis? Think back to the (female) singers who have been on Idol. When was the last time one of them was truly unattractive?

NEVER

This only applies to the girls because we have a double-standard about beauty. Men are okay if they don't meet the generalised standards of beauty, but heaven forbid that a woman be plain or unattractive and be judged on her talents alone.

Back to my original question: When was the last time a "frumpy" woman was on Idol? Even some of the girls who are outside the standard concept (read: waif-like) of what is considered attractive in America were still pretty. K-Lo. Mandisa. Amy Adams. J-Hud. None of them were "old" and none of them had frizzy hair and double chins. And if they stuck around long enough, they lost a bunch of weight and got make-overs.

I think what Susan Boyle does for us is remind us (collectively) that people cannot be judged by their appearance. Should her singing voice surprise us? Probably not. Yet it does anyway because we didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition.

The reality of our world, both on TV and in our daily lives, is that image matters. Appearance matters. When you meet someone, whether you want to admit it or not, you judge them based on the way they look. I do it. I know you do, too. What I hope Susan Boyle does for you (and by extension, for all of us) is to not rush to the easy conclusion.

Now on to the show . . .

Last week the judges inexplicably used their "historic" save on a singer who has no chance to win. Now we're stuck with seven singers when there should only be six. Of course, the bright side of all this means that two people (probably Matt and Anoop) will be eliminated tomorrow night.

MSNBC says either Danny or Adam is going to win and I can't really argue. Here are the odds I give to the seven remaining singers (note that I do not endorse gambling):

Matt - 10,000 to 1
Anoop - 2,000 to 1
Lil - 100 to 1
Kris - 50 to 1
Allison - 10 to 1
Danny - 5 to 1
Adam - 3 to 1

I still believe there will be a "shocking" elimination and that the person who will unexpectedly get whacked is Adam. For the most part, the singers have been voted off in a fairly predictable manner, but each season it seems that at least once a season, someone's voters get complacent or they have a bad week and someone is eliminated out of the blue. I'm guessing that happens in two or three weeks.

Seacrest starts the show by pacing about the stage and then running his yap. The theme is disco and Lil starts singing without a filler intro piece at 8:03. Maybe Idol is listening to me. I like her singing Chaka Khan, something very few people can pull off. Last week, I predicted that she would have a good week, and she delivers. She's no LaToya London, but this was her best outing since the voting rounds started. Going first will not help her, though. Last week, she was in the Pimp Spot and was still relegated to the Bottom 3; going in the Dead Man's Spot is certain doom.

Randy didn't like Lil and Kara is his parrot. If they have the same opinion all the time, why keep them both?

Kris gets the sit-down interview and has his guitar to sing Donna Summer. I like the non-disco disco song. I'm not a Kris fan, but this is a very good arrangement and performance. When singers have gone "unplugged" the result is usually good. Think of Adam's "Tracks of My Tears" or VCM's "Black Horse and the Cherry Tree", and this is easily in the same league. Plus, it's a song about a hooker, and that's never bad. Who was that guy cheering for him? Did he eat Kris's wife?

It's 8:22 and two singers have gone. There's less filler and they're already behind.

Next up is MWJD with some Earth, Wind & Fire. He's got yet another pair of glasses. The good news is that it seems the singers have gotten the "no ballad" memo. The bad news is that despite missing a couple of marks and doing a lot of shouting, the judges are going to slurp him right up. His performance was good, but the vocals were spotty. Why is that Randy will gloss over Danny's shortcomings when he rips into Lil for doing the same things? Paula already has written him into the finals.

Allison is bringing a rock take to Donna Summer. I like it, although I bet the judges don't. The one truth of both Allison and Amanda Overmeyer is that we already know how everything they sing is going to sound. My argument is that when the singers get to the "real" world, they're going to be singing in the same basic style anyway, and if it works, good for them. Allison's problem is that at this point, she may be falling into the Chris Daughtry trap; that is, she's not picking up new singers as the others fall by the wayside. She could also be a "shocker" elimination, especially given that she's been into the bottom 3 on several occasions.

With his big pompadour, EBA looks like he's three feet taller than Seacrest. Last week, he was the only one who didn't go the power ballad route, but he's the only one so far who's gone there tonight. His head if frickin' huge. While I'm not a fan of this song or the arrangement, what it does is show off his vocal range, at least until the screeching starts. I also like the performance; compared to last week's manic, all-over-the-stage hustle, just standing there and singing the song is a good move. Paula must know something we don't because she's guaranteed a spot for Adam and Danny in the finale.

The ads for Glee make me want to link to this video.



Who knew an Asian guy could sing Steve Perry without the huge schnozz? (I certainly can't sing like Steve)

He got saved last week (I guess he found Jesus!), and now Matt is wearing a fedora to cover up the third eye in the middle of his forehead. It's 8:48 and there are still two people left to sing. He steps out from behind the piano and actually tries to dance. Unfortunately, he doesn't ditch "the false", too. I don't hate it (at least until the end), which is as close to an endorsement that I can come. I think he'll be gone tomorrow. Again.

Drawing the Pimp Spot is Anoop, who needs a breakthrough performance to stave off elimination for another week. He's also singing Donna Summer and it doesn't really work for me, which is a shame since he can really sing. The arrangement was odd; starting slow and then speeding up (a little) seemed like he was trying to be Adam, but not succeeding. Was he trying to make the song into a ballad?

The Good
Kris, "She Works Hard For the Money"
Adam, "If I Can't Have You"

The Bad
Lil, "I'm Every Woman"
Allison, "Hot Stuff"
Matt, "Stayin' Alive"
Danny, "September"

The Ugly
Anoop, "Dim the Lights"

With two people being eliminated tomorrow, I don't know that there will be a bottom 3.

Who should go home:
Anoop, Matt

Who will go home:
Lil, Matt

I don't think he's got enough voters to stick around and I think this will be the first time since Nikko Smith that the same singer gets eliminated two weeks in a row.

I'm going to switch over to DWTS to watch Celtic Woman, then we'll see you tomorrow for the big Idol results show.

DWTS Results

Look, it's Ashly's little sister. I miss you Ashley! Come back to me and I promise I'll suck up to you like I do Kym and Julianne!

I was just watching the Journey video I posted and it dawned on me how much Arnel Pineda looks like one of my former college roommates. Come to think of it, I've never seen Arnel and Blobbo in the same room . . . . coincidence? I think not.

Mrs. High Lord thinks Ty is going to get whacked tonight. I think it will be Lawrence. Either, or . . . it doesn't matter; which ever of the two survives tonight will get eliminated next week.

It's good to see Celtic Woman on a channel other than PBS. I wish they had shown more the of the singers than the dancers I didn't know.

What happened to the dance off?

After all the filler, Lawrence and Edyta are eliminated. I'll bet he's happy he can go back to the golf course. Even though Ty isn't "necessarily" the next lowest in combined scores, surely he's got to be close.

I like Lawrence, even if he never had a chance to win. At least he was trying. I'm almost going to miss Edyta's barely there costumes, but it seems she started choreographing for her partner instead of herself this season. With a little luck, she'll get a good partner next season and be in the running for a top 3 finish (after Kym and Julianne, of course).

Tomorrow, we get a two-fer elimination on Idol. Yessssssssss!

High Lord. Out.