Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Dancing With the Stars Finale

Sorry I didn't blog last week's episode. I was just being lazy, but this being the finale, I figure I had better blog the last episode (unless somone in my family calls in the middle of the show again).

We're down to Emmitt Smith and Mr. I-Cheated-On-My-Wife-On-Our-Honeymoon. I think Marios is the better dancer, but according to the DialIdol people, Emmitt is in the lead. Under the scoring system Dancing With the Stars uses, the judges are irrelevant tonight; the winner of the popular vote will win the show.

We get three dances from each of them. One they have done previously, one with the same moves to the same song and one freestyle. Remember, it was the freestyle that I think Drew used last year to win with his "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" routine (not coincidentally along with partner Cheryl Burke).

We start off with GAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! . . . Filler.

I hate this crap. Mrs. High Lord just checked the TV Guide Channel and it looks like this show is going to be two hours tonight. Two hours. Two hours. I think I am going to go crazy. At least I can write lesson plans and grade papers during the crap part of the show.

And while I'm killing time, how about Jeff Bowden resigning as FSU's offensive coordintor?

It won't solve all their problems, but it's a start. Now they need to bring in another guy like Mark Richt who can actually coach quarterbacks. The defense is still good. However, they can't keep them in every game, not with the parity that has come to college football. With all of the great recruits FSU gets every year, there is no reason why they're in second-to-last place in their division in the ACC.

FSU's offense was out-coached on a consistent basis and now we can only hope that they can get back on their feet in the next year or so.

Now back to the show . . .

First up is Emmitt and he's doing the samba. Man, those are some ugly-ass shoes. At least his guns look as good as Ed Hochuli's. He always looks like he's having fun, especially when he's not doing the traditional ballroom styles. I Cheryl has really whipped him into dancing shape. Combined with his desire to win and be the best at whatever he's doing, I think he stands a good chance of winning.
The Judges's Scores: 10-10-10
The High Lord's Score: 9

Next up is the former Mr. Ali Landry. Technically, he's a better dancer than Emmitt, but we should expect that since he's trained as a dancer before. At least that's according to IMDB.com. I believe that one the show he has said that he hasn't had any dance training, and I also believe that makes him a liar. Maybe he and Karina are trying to distract the audience because she's wearing next to nothing.
The Judges's Scores: 10-9-10
The High Lord's Score: 9

Emmitt comes back with his mambo that was almost perfect the first time. It's good, but he looks like he's counting in his head again. I think I would actually score it lower this time around.
The Judges's Scores: 10-10-10
The High Lord's Score: 8

Trailing by one, Mario comes to us with his 29-point paso doble. Mario also looks like he's counting along in his head. Maybe it's because his muscle memory has worn off and he's forgottent he choreography. I'd give him a lower score on this one, too.
The Judges's Scores: 10-10-10
The High Lord's Score: 8

For his last dance, Emmitt whips out some vintage Hammer, complete with the Hammer shuffle. Who is this guy they've got singing. Mrs. High Lord doesn't like him and neither do I. I don't know if this is good enough to win, but he looks like he's having fun. It wasn't as good as Cheryl and Drew last year, but I think he put up a good showing. The gold shoes were nice, too.
The Judges's Scores: 10-10-9
The High Lord's Score: 9

Mario's freestyle is also to the bad vocal stylings of the house band who clearly shouldn't be doing any rap songs. His dacing is good. I predict perfect 10s, although some of his holds and lifts have not been clean.
The Judges's Scores: 10-10-10
The High Lord's Score: 9

That leaves both contestants with the same score going into the voting, meaning that the outcome of the show is entirely in the hands of the viewers.

In a pure dancing competition, I think Mario would win, but since this is a popularity contest, I think Emmitt has a leg up. He's simply a more well-known celeb. Even though the viewership of this show is something like 70% women, I think a lot of poeple know that Mario has a reputation as not being able to keep it in his pants, while Emmitt is known to just about everyone.

Who knows? Jerry finished in second place last year. Emmitt can win this year (I can only hope).

My prediction is that Emmitt is going to win because he's been the consistent leader at DialIdol, meaning that his line has been busy more often than Mario's, and presumably that also means that more people are voting for him.

I've got a late program after class tomorrow, so I won't find out live, but we'll see.

High Lord. Out.